Too many years ago to think about, I gained my first Management Consultancy contract for my solo entrepreneurial business.
I was excited. I had my freedom, I was doing what I loved.
Facilitating people to learn more about themselves and create humane “learning organisations’, as we called them back then. Facilitating workplaces to be where people were valued for their contribution and the organisation was thriving, ethical, creative and humane.
Before I knew it I was getting assignments nationally and internationally and being asked to open conferences and do keynotes. I was doing innovative, ground breaking work and getting paid well. Everything was great.
My husband’s career took off. He had become CEO of a government organisation. His work was demanding and time consuming.
We had a beautiful house the kids were doing well in their private schools and then….
The cracks started to appear.
My husband and I worked well together both of us were happy for each other but we were like ships passing each other in the night. Before you know it we had dis-connected and were alienated from one another. What I said at the time, “I love you, but I don’t love you.” (I now know that was b..s…more about that at another time.) We had an amicable divorce after 21 years and I took time off to recuperate and take stock.
Maybe it is not your relationship that is falling through the cracks perhaps it is something else. I would love other entrepreneurs to take heed, so ask yourself the question before things amplify and it is too late.
- What did you want to create when you started your business?
- Are you creating what you wanted for your business and life?
- What is falling through the cracks?
Being pre-occupied with success and the business that let me lose sight of what I wanted to create in the first place, a strong loving family AND a contribution to the world in pursuing my purpose in life. I needed to re-connect with what I had originally wanted to create. But then how to do it second time around and single this time.
Have you ever heard or experienced stopping after being extremely busy and you suddenly realise you are more stressed than you thought you were? I needed more time to chill out than I thought and I was not going to let the business take me away from the things that mattered to me this time. Kids, parents, friendships my soul connection. This time it was the business that suffered, however, I am thankful I took the time to care for my parents until they passed on. There were many treasured experiences that I would have denied myself and them, if I had prioritised the business over helping them die well.
Now I have started again in the online world.
This time I am keeping the connection to my heart’s desire with a whole new sense of myself, relationships, life and what is important to me and my valued clients.
I feel deeply present in my body, I connect to my spiritual guidance as a daily practise. I am not following some-one else’s dream of having it all, of growth at any cost?
I am creating my business in a way that is balanced between the time to connect deeply with my own creative and soulful pursuits, whether that be through play, story telling, dance, art, mosaic, horses. I have time for stillness and for being in nature. I create time to cook wholesome meals and enjoy the garden. All of these pursuits are sources of inspiration for the wisdom I share with my clients.
My family holds a high priority. I am writing this article from my temporary office on the beach in Cambodia, whilst visiting my son who has been living here for 2 years. Last year I volunteered with my other son in his NGO www.onegirl.org.au in Sierra Leone. I took time out to connect and enjoy both my brother and sister’s company on an extended holiday whilst still writing and coaching in a way that flowed with ease and grace.
I had a swim this morning, a walk on the beach with my son and his 2 dogs. I had a stimulating conversation about global issues with a German tourist and now I am writing this article. Later today, I am being interviewed by a magazine over Skype. Tomorrow a Skype mentoring call. I plan my time to write to share what is valuable for my clients and I am more productive than I have ever been. Life is good. Business is good.
There is much work to be done but all in it’s own time whilst valuing what is important in the whole of my life moment by moment.
I leave you with these questions.
- What is it that you most value?
- What was the intention of you creating your business?
- For your life? For yourself? For your family? For your clients?
- Are your actions valuing the things that you say you value?
- What is falling through the cracks?
- Will having more and growing your business exponentially give you your heart desires or not?
- How much is enough?
All of our answers will be different for these questions. We all have different, circumstances and different needs.
Remember what you value and hold it dearly.
You may want to change some things in your life and your business but not all things need changing, not all things need growing. Some just require care, maintenance, love and tenderness.
(Note from Denise: You can see how I navigated some of these challenges in my post Challenges & Successes From My Second Year In Business)