Hi there gorgeous,
We’ve all had it happen: you’re clearing blocks like a mofo, decluttering your life, making upgrades and manifesting like a pro when suddenly someone says something that brings you crashing down.
It can be just a simple sentence, but the effect is HUGE.
Worst, it can often come from the people closest to you, who SHOULD be happy for you that you’re creating success in your life.
Sometimes these people have so many money blocks themselves that they just don’t realize how negative they’re being, or how it affects you.
So, what can you do when it happens to you?
Listen below or download here.
This is the most common question I get asked from women new to the Lucky Bee community – how do you create your ideal life and stay positive when you’re surrounded by people who are constantly negative?
It could be your husband, partner, friend, colleague, family member or even someone random in your world who shows up occasionally and brings you down.
It can be incredibly difficult to make a big change and expand your world when there’s someone (or maybe more than one) person who feels like a major impediment to your success.
Dealing with negative people is a mega energy drainer and here’s the truth: If you want to continue creating a First Class life, you have to be prepared to…
Upgrade the people around you
Do the people around you reflect where you want your life to be?
As the popular Jim Rohn quote goes, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with,” so if your ratio of negative friends is too high, it’s time for an upgrade.
You really don’t have to stay friends with the same people forever; you’re not still stuck at high school! (We all had that bitchy frenemy, right?)
When you’re starting out changing your life, you’re particularly vulnerable to other people’s opinions and negative energy.
So you really have to protect yourself. That doesn’t mean you have to cut people out of your life, but maybe at crucial points, you have to limit your exposure to their negativity.
Over the last couple of years, I’ve had to cull some negative people from my life who just weren’t making me feel good anymore. This included compulsive liars and shady entrepreneurs and people who were whining about their life (but never changing it).
I realized it was much more fun to seek out new friends who would motivate and inspire me to be a better person and it was also easier to keep my energy high. It’s the same concept when you want to start eating healthier. Introduce new people into your life to “crowd out” the negative influences.
How do you do it?
If you’re feeling vulnerable – just say no to hanging out with those people. Make excuses if you want, but your energy is too important to waste on negative people who don’t want you to succeed.
You can change the subject if your loved one starts getting too negative, limit your time together to doing something distracting like going to the movies, or steer clear of certain conversations that make you feel bad.
This might sound harsh, but if you’re serious about changing your life, this is what it takes, and it might not be forever. Some of your friends and family might even be motivated by you changing your life.
Either way, it’s important to protect your energy at times when you’re feeling the most vulnerable, maybe when you’re working towards a big goal or when you’re in the process of working on your blocks.
How to deal with negative family members
You can’t choose your family, right?
No – but you can choose how they affect you and how much time you spend with them, especially the negative ones.
Pick your battles! I know that trying to discuss certain topics with my family use to cause me unimaginable rage but I know better now and don’t bring it up anymore.
Choose your topic of conversation carefully. I can say now that this gets easier with practice, so keep going and it will get less triggering over time.
And remember – your family might not necessarily be the best audience for you to talk through business challenges. Keep those conversations for your coach or mastermind buddies!
How to deal with a negative partner
Living with a negative partner SUCKS when you’re trying to change your life or upgrade your relationship with money.
Honestly, it’s one of the biggest problems that I see in my Lucky Bitch Money Bootcamp, but I have some good and bad news for you.
The bad news is that your partner should never be the excuse for why you’re not living your ideal life. You have to take responsibility for your thoughts and feelings about money.
Unless you want to completely declutter your relationship (which happens all the time in our community), I would consider having a discussion about their negativity and how it affects you. They might not even be aware of how they talk about money.
My husband had this way of saying ‘money’ that was absolutely loaded with poverty consciousness, fear and lack. I asked him “Are you on the prosperity train or are you off it? Because I’m going with or without you!”
Harsh, right? But it was a necessary conversation and I felt much better telling him how I felt about his (unintended) negativity than I did holding it in.
Lastly, when you’re dealing with ANY negative person, just remember that you can’t change them. You CAN try to find positive traits in them, and you can practice your forgiveness with them, too.
Most of all, make sure you take note of what they bring up for you. Maybe their behavior is highlighting another money block for you that needs clearing.
But never let anyone be your excuse for not living a First Class life. Be the role model and hold true to your vision.
Keep clearing your blocks and moving forward!
If you need my help to identify more of your own barriers to making money, make sure you check out my free audio that will help you clear your money blocks, fast!
Download it at www.LuckyBitch.com/Blocks
It’s your time, and you’re ready for the next step.
Did you miss last weeks post? Check it out here: Denise Interviews Danielle LaPorte on Money