Here’s what we’re talking about this week…
- Signs that you’ve hit an upper limit belief
- Overcoming self sabotage
- How to anchor in your good experiences
Prefer to listen? Press play below:
Lucky Bitch Video Transcript – Why Do I Sabotage Myself? (And How I Almost Crashed My New Car)
This is such a juicy topic and something that not many people like to talk about because after all why would you sabotage yourself when something good happens? Like why would we be that stupid? But unfortunately, it happens all the time.
So let me give you a recent example. I bought a new car and up until then I’ve had kind of crappy secondhand cars. My first car was like $2000 and the ceiling was dragging down and luckily, I’m five foot four but I had a really tall person sit my car and it was literally hanging down around his head. It’s really, really embarrassing.
I’d be traveling to go speak at events and I’d be thinking, “Please don’t let anyone see me in this shitty car.”
My second car was kind of okay but not that great either.
I really wanted to upgrade to a brand new car. I was at the showroom and they make a really big deal out of it. Shout out to Klosters Newcastle!
We went to pick up the car and they had it all beautifully washed right in the center of the showroom and they had gone to pick up my Lucky B, personalized number plates and it just looked amazing.
When you buy a secondhand car, they’re just like, “Here you go.” And then as soon as you drive off the lot, they have no responsibility for you at all.
I started having my buttons pushed almost straightaway buying this car because they’re showing you around like, “You know and here’s the boot, here’s the thing, and here’s a special gift for you. And you know, if anything happens, you just give us a call.” They were showing me everything in the car.
I started feeling kind of crappy.
I was like, “Oh, my God. This is a brand new car like I’m going to have to be really careful of this freaking car. Oh my God. Maybe this was too much.
Maybe I didn’t need a brand new car.”
I could feel the resistance coming out, right?
Then the funniest thing happened. They handed me the car keys and they’re like, “Congratulations!”
And I stacked it, I did the most spectacular slow motion fall you could imagine. I slipped, I crashed into a fence, I crashed into my car, I landed down on my knees, and these guys are going, “Huh?”
Then I was like, “I’m okay. I’m fine. It’s all right.”
I got my car keys and I sat in my car and these guys are looking each other and going, “Is she okay?” And I just thought, “Oh, my God. I hope I don’t like drive off and then suddenly crash it into a wall.”
I realized that happened because I was feeling so freaked out and I’d reached an upper limit point.
If you guys have read the book, The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks, he talks about how you get to a point and it feels like well, this is too much happiness.
This is too much good stuff that’s happening to me and we can often sabotage that.
For me this sabotage happened straightaway. It happened like bang, crash, crash, crash, bang, bang! But sometimes, it can take a little while for that sabotage to kick in.
One of my clients from the Money Bootcamp upgraded her car during the course and it got stolen within a month and I was so curious because that was her first new car as well and I kind of said to her, “What was going on?”
Sometimes it is that feeling of like, “Do I really deserve this?” It doesn’t matter what happens to you, it could be a new car or promotion, a new client, there’s a little bit part of you that sometimes goes, “this is a fluke” or “this is too much” or it just triggers you in another way that you think something bad must be on its way.
So here’s how you overcome that feeling and here’s how you stop that sabotage in its tracks.
First of all, you have to be constantly upgrading your life and getting used to having good things happen to you. It’s really important to have those good things happening all the time.
The second thing is if you’re one of those people who think, “Ah, one good thing will happen and then one bad thing.” Or, “I’ll break a mirror and three bad things will happen to me.” Or “Bad luck comes in threes.” You have to really, really watch that part of you that is making those stories come true because you’re literally creating it.
The third thing is when something really good happens is to anchor it into your experience. When something good happens and you kind of feel like a bit drunk on it like a little bit high and you’re like, “Ha, ha. This is so good. Oh, it’s too good.” This is when you really want to anchor in.
So I sat in my car and I just went, “You know what? I deserve this. This is real. I deserve it. This is beautiful. I’m going to take care of it. I don’t need to worry. I don’t need to sabotage this anymore.” Then I can really experience it in a present moment. That’s part of the anchoring experience.
It could be that you tell yourself, say for example, it was – you had your best month ever. A lot of women have their best month and then the next month is their worst month ever. That’s exactly what’s happened to me so many times. January this year I had my highest record month. Then February was my worst month in like two years.
I see this happen a lot and part of it is to go this is not a fluke. I can repeat this. I can replicate this success. It’s safe for me to be successful. It’s safe for me to have nice things. It’s safe for good things to happen to me all of the time.
The last thing is really to know that if bad things do happen, it’s kind of okay.
Like with the car key thing with me crashing and burning spectacularly, I just went, “You know what universe? Thank you. That’s all I need. I don’t need you to send me anything else. This is more than enough reminder for me to breathe this in and enjoy it and not sabotage it.”
I would love to hear your experiences in the comments below:
- Have you ever sabotaged a wonderful success?
- Have you ever told yourself that it was a fluke and then you manifested something bad?
- Or if you’ve already learnt how to get beyond that, what are some of the tools and techniques that you use to make sure that you enjoy your success and you just get better and better?
Enjoy your good fortune and I’ll see you soon.